Wow. Made it to L.A. :-) I've decided I'm going to make a video of the weekend so you guys can eventually get some what of a glance of what I am doing this weekend. So if I start talking about things that are irrelevant, just wait for the video. haha.
I'm sitting here on the bed, mom and dad went to go shopping. ;-) And if I uploaded the video you could see the crazy view off the patio outside our door... but that will have to wait. It is about 80 degrees down here and really muggy. But hey, it's california! There are so many people here, who knows which ones are agents.
Here's some thought that started going through my head...
1) I don't have any clue what is going to happen this week.
2) There are a million people here that already seem intimidating.
3) One of those people is a 4 year old girl who can act your face off ;-)
4) I only have a few weeks left until I leave for Peru.
5) I'm soo excited..
And most importantly 6) Why would God have me be in this situation if everywhere I turn seems to be fleshly.
Maybe you've wondered it...I sure have. Why would God have me going into acting/modeling. Isn't that entire world all about image, self-exaltation, and idolatry. If you were asking me I would say YES. So why would God have me in this spot?...
I was reading through Proverbs 2 today, and I think it answered some of the questions... Questions like "How could I keep from sin and the flesh if that is basically all that is offered in the career I am seeking out?" "How can I keep my eyes focused on God, and not on myself?" "How can I stay out of idolatry?"
What do you think?... Proverbs 2 seemed to give me peace. If I stay in God's word, and seek for wisdom like silver, then He will give me understanding. He will be my protection. He will not let deliver me over to the way of evil.
So now... I guess I just need to trust. And I pray that you would to. In whatever area of your life. You may feel like you are the worst person ever, you may feel like your relationship with God is down the drain, you may feel like you have lost all faith... but as long as you keep advancing, keep searching, keep wanting. Even if you feel the situation isn't changing at all, just trust. Know that if you get yourself into the Lord's Word and seek after wisdom and understanding with all your heart, you will be delivered from that which oppresses you.
This weekend I don't don't if I will walk away with everything anyone could dream of or if I will walk away empty handed. All I know is God is in control and I am at peace when I am focusing on him and not myself.
We all need to stay in the Word. Always seeking. Never stopping.